When I left home at 19 I was emotionally stunted and pretty much devoid of social skills.  Luckily I fell in with a loving and kind group of gay people who helped me grow up.  They were all so quick-witted, and I wasn’t, that they called me their “straight man,” my George Burns to their Gracie Allen.  I learned many important and useful things.  I share them freely.  Don’t carry a wallet in your back pocket because it spoils the line of your jeans. Don’t put a sweater in the dryer.  Swimmers have the best bodies. You must hang Christmas tree ornaments so they dangle freely and do not get caught up on other branches; similarly, you must hang the tinsel strand by strand rather than glopping it on.  Continue reading →